Happy New Year everyone!
2013 was definitely the most challenging year I have had yet but it’s also been the most rewarding. A recap on the highlights of the year would be:
Starting full-time work in an architecture office.
Volunteering as a SONA Representative for the Australian Institute of Architects.
Visiting my first construction site for the Faculty of Architecture at Melbourne University.
Applying and being accepted into a Masters program at RMIT.
Networking and organising events for students and professionals.
Ran and logged 582km on Nike+ for the year.
Looking back, last year was really career focused and because of it, a lot of my personal relationships have been on the back burner. It’s something I’ve obviously learned the hard way, so my first resolution for 2014 is to have a better work-life balance and give myself time to appreciate personal relationships and ambitions. Resolution #2 is that I want to give more attention to this blog and document my year in photographs, drawings, and writings.
I am actually really excited for 2014. I’ll be travelling through south-east asia at the end of this month for three weeks, continuing with full-time work for another 6 months, starting my Masters at RMIT University for the second half of 2014, travelling in December for my first white Christmas, Birthday and New Year’s in New York City. I have high hopes for the memories, people, challenges, and life lessons to come.
Thank You Fred,
I have been well and I hope the same can be said for you. This year has come and gone so quickly and I have mixed feelings about 2013, I think it’s always a little hard to evaluate something when you’re too close to it. Similar to having to step back in order to see the whole picture. Maybe closer to the new year, I’ll have a better retrospective view but right now my mind is still preoccupied with plans for the future, deadlines at the office and a growing desire to climb into bed.
If you wouldn’t mind, I might take this opportunity to answer a question you’ve asked previously but I have yet to answer (sorry again!). “What’s your mindset when you do choose to write here? What is your blog meant for?”
I have always loved writing, but the real affair began with reading. From a young age you could find me under the covers with a flashlight reading the latest novel from my collection. Words became much more to me than a series of black letters on paper, they were my ticket to different worlds, times, and lives. It still amazes me what is involved when you read. The recognition of seemingly arbitrary symbols as letters, then an arrangement of letters as words, which in turn create connections, allowing meaning to surface. All of this happens instantaneously, choreographed precisely to impose feelings and provoke thought.
In many ways, writing was just as much an escape as reading. I used to be quite shy so I kept a lot of my thoughts and feelings to myself. Writing became the key to unlocking those thoughts. For those tough times it was my therapy and the one place I could be honest with myself. My own sanctuary in paper and ink.
To answer your question, it’s almost always that when I write here, it’s for reflection or release. The mindset I’m in when I write is similar to an exhale. In the rush of everything, when I just find time to breathe again this is where I find my oxygen. The blog becomes a time capsule of my life, in all it’s joy, failures, successes, adventures and lessons.
Words are powerful, they have given me so much and I hope through this medium I can offer some kind of meaning to those who stumble onto my train of thought out of pure happenstance.
I know its been over two week’s since I wrote that post and since you’ve written this question. I’m sorry I’ve only gotten back to you now. I think you’ve captured the essence of what makes a home and it rings true with one of my current dilemmas now. I certainly feel safe in my home, uninhibited and comfortable might be another thing though. I don’t think I’ll feel free until I’m completely open with my family about who I am. It’s as though a timer’s been ticking for a while now and I’m realising that it’s reaching the limit and so am I. If we look towards history, freedom has always come at a price so I know it’s one I can’t escape paying.
For the next month I’ll be home alone. My parents and little brother left this morning to enjoy a vacation away in asia while I continue working through my internship. This isn’t the first time I’ve had the house to myself but I think the next month will be different because I’ve been thinking a lot about the definition of home.
I guess this is connected to my desire to move out or even possibly overseas to study and/or work. Wherever it is I go, would I still feel at home on my own? I’m not extremely close with my family so I can’t say how much they have informed my notion of a home. However, having them gone might surprise me.
It is only the first night and I can already feel the difference. There’s an evident stillness in the house. I can hear my own thoughts surfacing to sound. There have been so many things racing through my mind, a lot of which has left me in a bit of a dark place. I don’t know what it is but I know I can’t keep denying that something is wrong when I haven’t felt like myself in a long time. I’m hoping this new arrangement will shed some clarity on the questions gnawing at the back of my mind. I can only hope and only time will tell.